The story of Nodiatis as seen by me

[flipynifty]

I awoke on the docks in some strange town I had never seen. My pants were at my ankles and I turned to see a very drunken man walking away, fishing pole in hand. He turned and winked at me and then he was gone.

I went to the small town and purcahsed an Iron Gaff and swore my revenge. I trained on the docks killing rats and crabs and when I was ready I went to find this drunken fisherman. He was on the south of the docks, almost like he was waiting for me.

I took my iron gaff and shoved it so far up his bum his eyes popped out. I took his fishing rod as a momento to remember this by.

That's what he gets for not calling me...

[zenga]

Try Find a Veterinarian - Local Vets and Veterinary Clinics, Vet Services or Veterinarians.com - Find a Vet Clinic for Your Pet in Your Area to get medicine.

*gives zenga his 'medicine'*

flip u need to work on the rest of the story

[Abeltronics]

that story made me laugh irl!

[Melusinenyxie]

that was a very short story =/

[flipynifty]

I totally forgot i even wrote this... more to come

[flipynifty]

After the epic battle with the drunken fisherman I made my way back to Castille. My pride and bum still hurting from the experience. The shop keeper in the weapons shop suggesed I upgrade to a grass sword. Looking at this sword I thought to myself that a papercut would do more damage, so I crafted my own paper sword.. I headed towards travellers way, many people gave warnings of the dreaded runt foxes and snakes that peppered the trail... I did not heed these warnings for they seemed rather minor compared to the tale of the orc and ogre that I will be sure to meet.

As I took my first step onto travellers way a tiny fox that came up to my ankles began to attack me. I laughed at this feeble little fox until It nearly ripped my arm off. I bagan swinging my paper sword in a feeble attempt to ward this fox off but it was to no avail. The tiny fox got a hold of my throat and ripped it clean out... everything went black.

I awoke back in castille again with a new respect for tiny animals....

flip thats funneh :P

maybe we will have nod storys thread, what u ppl say?

[Abeltronics]

haha new respect for tiny animals

Abelol likes hampsters named lemmiwinks.

[Relic]

*A few weeks later*

There i was, proudly sporting my new suit of copper, kinda rusty and smelled like the drunken fishermans skivies.. and cheese..and hotdogs.. strange. Although smelly and rusted, i felt INVINCIBLE while wearing my new found armors. So i adventured south from a small town named strondad, until i eventually wondered upon a slimy reptile, who was rather aggressive, i begged and pleaded, even called for help in the uncivil channel. . . to no avail.. they just laughed at me.. after the newt got tired of tossing me around like a ragdoll i awoke in a strange new land.. no.. this is strondad again... F u c k!

So i gathered a group of companions to go reap my vengeance upon this foul creature, with time we had the beast cornered... nowhere to run now STOOPID FKIN LIZARD! YOUR TIME HAS COME! As i thrusted my burnt dagger into his forehead (Posts pics in forum, Hyuck!) i felt a feeling.. a feeling i have never felt before.. it was to say the least invigorating! *LEVEL UP!*

With my new found confidence i headed deep into a forest of ferns, after a week of hiking and slaughtering birds, and lizards i had come upon a giant monkey.. this thing smelled terrible and had the temper and strength to match.
It threw my mangled body up in the air, and punted me into a tree, then picked me up by my feet and slapped the ground with my body until all the bones were broken.. i was no match for the tremendous power of this beast..
i pondered my options.. i knew i hadnt a chance to defeat this beat.. i had finally understod the meaning of the word PWNT.. it was a lesson well learned and will never be forgotten.. as i shamefully walked down the trail i could only think of my epic failure.. so i rerolled.

To be continued

[Tridius]

lol, what about scorched boss?

it made me all wet..... when it pwned me.

[flipynifty]

After rerolling I found myself in a familiar place, but maybe a little more "learned" this time. Damnit i'm in Castille again. Once again I talk to that ugly mofo the "seer" who I find staring at my crotch area while he talks to me more than my face. I find myself repeating to him "hey i'm up here man" but the eyes make their way down again. He tells me I need to kill some rats and the drunken fisherman... AGAIN... ffs.

I buy another iron gaff and proceed to the docks. After killing a few rats and escaping those dangerous crabs I meet face to face with the stinkin' drunk fisherman who, once again, wishes to touch me in ways I havene't been touched. No such luck this time fisherman!! I stick the gaff directly into his septum and push it in... i'm pushing as hard as I can when I suddenly feel something against my leg. Looking down I can see he's sporting quite the... "package". I look up and only see he is smiling and has but a red 1 above his head. He laughs and everything goes black. I awake to find my pants at me ankles again in Castille... This is going to be a long day

[Sapreaver]

I walk back on to the dock ashamed but slightly pleased after all the fisherman was rather well hung but alas he has to die from filling me with his sea men. So I killed some of those nasty rats with help help of my trusty gaff after a few days I worked up enough nerve to walk to up to the fisherman and finish the deed. this time however I had these wierd glowly bead type things this homo***ual sold me saying it could wake the dead. As I begin my assualt a pull one of those beads and shoot it at him and it seems to home in on his anus and dives right in I screamed yes as the stunned fisherman gets impaled by my gaff and falls over but alas revenge is a wierd little slut and I had to plunge my hand deep in to his but to retrieve my wierd glowly bead thingy when my arm is up to my elbow he turns and looks at me with a gay ass smile and hits me over the head being trapped in his ass he procedes to pwn me I fall over and black out and wake up in castille with sore bum and throat and when I stand up I realize there is a string hanging out of my bum so I pull on it and moan as a bead the size of my fist comes out and about 10 more in decreasing size I walk around the town not realizine there is a fish stuck to my back with a sign below it thats says " I had *** with this fish". I put my hand in my pouch thingy out but stuff on my wierd glowy bead is right there, "**** me" I exclaim and some black dude thats says his name is jon comes down on me and procedes to *** my bottom.

Roflmao irl funneh f*ckers lol. I shall have to write the story of the epic 3 vs 2 battle of Great Plateau

There were 3 brave souls, equipped with virgin bums, stalking their 78 epics under the scorching GP sun. When suddenly from out of nowhere a gang of 2 beasts, one wieldign giant haunted totems and the other launching a barrage of arrows. The 3 were abrupbtley pounced upon and laid waste to. 1 by one they were mercilessly slain, barely able to stop one of the beasts. Moments later the 3 lay there shamed, their pride and virginity gone, and with no epics to claim as there own....

[zoidberginc]

rofl mord has to tell more (better) storys

Ok, so we probably aren't ever going to get to the part where we rescue the immortal woman in the fetishy predicament that snagged our attention in the first place, are we? I'm ok with that, I guess.

Alright. I am Mothpire, the offspring of the vampire king and the moth queen. Or a hastily created username based on my character class and my favored internet handle.

I have come to be humanity's savior.

Sort of. Mostly, I was curious whether that hot chick actually factors into the game in any way. But I violate the fourth wall.

I suck at initializing roleplay scenarios, so let's just say that I woke up with a wicked hangover and no memories, just outside the gates of... I forget the name, and I don't care. Let's call it Noobtown. Castile? Something like that... only it's not Spain, so it's probably something else. Ok, Noobtown it is.

I thirsted for blood, but a voice in my head compelled me not to go East just yet, though I was so tempted by the smell of the blood of a local careless, drunken fisherman who roamed the docks.

By some coincidence, all the money to my name was exactly just enough money to buy... whatever it was, something crappy, like a bent fire poker with a letter opener duct ****d to the end. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, I spent my gold pieces and went out. Surely it would suffice for taking down a drunk fisherman. There would be blood soon.

Following the advice of the seer, I went looking for the fisherman. The seer also wanted some rat pelts or something, so sure, whatever. As I was following the trail, my hands inexplicably started filling up with... some kind of potion. And my feet stung. As the potions piled up, my feet stung more and more, and I could not find the source of this pain. With half of my health departed, I hatefully threw the infernal potions to the ground, and only then did I see what had been obscured from view by the potions: 6 translucent boxes hovering near my feet, two of them with "no" signs through them, and behind that... A goddamned crab! That bastard! Normally it would've been a no-contest fight in my favor, but I was already bled half to death by degrees. Later, I was to discover that all fights in this strange world went the same way. It was a close call, but I won the fight, reenacting to popular YouTube video "Crab Battle" as I swung my rock ****d to a wiffle bat down hard on the crustacean again and again.

I knew the taste of victory.